Why am I marching in October?

Why are you marching for gay marriage if your partner does not believe in it?

One of my friends asked me this question the other day and I decided to respond to their question on my blog. The reason for my response on here and not to their personal email is because I wanted everyone to know the answer to this question. First thing I want to clear up is the march in October isn’t a march for gay marriage.

No, this march is so much more then that. It is to put a public spotlight on the fact that we are not second class citizens and we demand the same federal rights as our straight counterparts. It is to fight to overturn “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”, so those members who are LGBTQ and serving in our country’s Armed Forces are not dishonorable discharged from service. It is to help stop the beating and the killing of LGBTQ people on the streets of their hometowns. This march is to help ensure that ENDA (Employment Non-Discrimination Act) passes so people don’t lose their jobs just because they are LGBTQ. It is also to ensure that partners of LGBTQ people can honor the wishes of their partner I something tragic was to happen. It is to guarantee that the partners of someone who is hospitalized is able to stay by their lover’s side to provide comfort.

So now that I went on a rant about the march, let me get to the fact that my partner is against gay marriage. To his defense, he isn’t against gays having the same federal benefits as our straight counterparts. He is against the concept of marriage. To him marriage is a religious right and nothing to do with federal rights.

Now with that said, he did say that even if we were able to get gay marriages legalized in the United States that he would not have one is a different issue. For when he told me this, my heart shattered. I dreamt of having a wedding and sharing the trails and triumphs we faced with our friends and family on that special day. But when those words came out of his mouth, my dreams just crumbled before me. I sat there in shock, I did not know what to do. For a while I listened to friends and family telling me not to worry about it, because gay marriage would never be legalized in my life time. I almost convinced myself to believe them, but then Iowa legalized gay marriage.

I thought to myself and decided that just because my partner doesn’t believe in this issue, that doesn’t mean I have to stop believing in it. For you see just because you are in a relationship, does not mean you to agree on the same issues. I agree that this is a big issue to disagree on, and who knows maybe it will be the nail in the coffin that ends a wonderful relationship. Only time can tell. . .

But for now I am going to continue to fight for all the rights that this march is about. Not only for myself, but also for the future generations to come. I once was told that one person can not change the world. But here I am, just one voice whispering in the wind hoping that I convince one person to make a difference.

Do you hear my voice?

MJ